The Hijdas are born with an eternal pain , fighting the origin of the flame of their flickering life.
They are kidnapped human souls imprisoned in a bottle that breaks easily.
They are biological male but with marked mannerisms of women.
Right from their early childhood they have been misunderstood, and at a very fragile age abused by relatives and people who enjoy having sex with kids.
The rampant superstitious view of rural Indian sex life is that copulating with kids cleanses you of venereal disease and reinvigorates your languishing libido.
The Indian hungry male seeks such soft target , near public toilets or in the fields in rural areas.
The Hijdas life is a cameo of a travesty of misinterpreted gender.
Even in the early days it was a lady like male that enacted the role of a womans part in Ram Leelas or bawdy performance or village stage shows.
In the days of the Nawabs these third sex were treated as Zinana, and were part of their envious Harem..
Laundebazi or homsexuality was comfortably prevalent and nobody raised eyebrows, on your sexual preference, doe eyed little boys were the love of the gentry.. taken good care of , dressed as women .
The Hijdas were great dancers , most of the feminine Hijdas were part of the history of Mujra dance, and one never knew the difference unless you slept with them, man once besotted would sleep with a dead body too.
Such is the vagaries of love.
Even today married men get atrociously attracted to eunuchs or hijdas, renouncing their wife and family or having both , I met a lot of males at Ajmer Sharif, who came here to connect with Hijdas.
The Hijdas are human whatever their ignominy of fate, the Hijda knows his old age is a living death , without financial aid or security, though the Hijda samaj takes good care of them, but the fiercely independent one hitch themselves to rich moneyed class, and havinga hijda mistress is less head ache, no alimony cheques, not getting "flucked " by divorce lawyers, no menstual machinations and "fluck" no kids.
Hijdas have suitors dying to hold them in their arms, the hijdas are adept in the art of lovemaking, its a biblical fact that comes with the territory.
Just a single touch of a Hijda is enough to set your entire erogenous zone on fire, all this told to me by a young toy boy, at Haji Malang.
But there is a flip side too , the Hijda does not relenquish his love easily.. not even androgynous God can save you from a Hijda spurned.
I have a lot of stories locked up in my head.
Hijda crime , is rotting in dead police files closed unsolved,murders where the hijda was a suspect , move freely.
And it is human to commit crime so its not just a Hijda trait.
There are bad apples among men and women too.
I always told my Hijda Guru Laxmi Narayan Tripathi , if she ever wrote a book on the Hijdas it would be a run away Hit.. she needs no ghost writer she is sublime with words..educated and evocatively provocative too.
She hates photographers who take her for granted , but she treats me as family, I respect her and still take her permission when I shoot her .
She is gifted she reads my mind, she knows who is bluffing her , or who is making money at her expense, I luckily as a photo blogger dont have to go under an editorial desk , give head to get my story on Hijdas publised..
Unlike the photo journalist who reaps rewards , when a single picture is published , I am read and my pictures are not at the mercy of any establishment, they can post a page I have unlimited account at Flickr… Yes they call me Pro…Ha Ha
My pictures or my stories will never suffer from mental blocks..
I still have Hijda unposted stuff , the Dargah at Dongri Rafaee acts and I go to shoot Athvi juloos at Govandi this evening..