Thank you AnnaMaria....My family and I have never faced anything like this before...within three days our whole world became a horrible whirlwind....wanting to honor our father's wishes for no feeding tubes, nothing to prolong his life and yet still hoping and praying for some sign that would give us hope....three days wasn't enough time for us to decide....but we had to make a choice and it was sheer hell....he came home palliative care only....NPO....my oldest sister lost her cool over the nothing by mouth....she said she will not stand by and watch daddy starve.....but the only other choice we had was a feeding tube which my dad said he never wanted...right now everything seems like a horrible nightmare....how does one honor their father's wishes when their heart is seeking and grasping every little movement from him to mean something positive....today for a few minutes he knew his preacher and actually gave his little funny smile when the preacher asked him where the first well in SC was dug...and when I asked him where his whistle was he used his left hand and patted his neck...I gave him a whistle to wear around his neck and he was mighty pleased with it...the brain is an amazing thing...part of it is damaged but other parts still work....does one go for feeding tubes to hang onto that precious part that still knows us, but will never have the quality of life he had before the stroke...how do give up hope when you put his little dog in the bed with him and hear her whining and see your dad's hand pet her....he's still in there and it is the most painful thing I've ever experienced...I want to honor his wishes but it is so hard....are we doing the right thing goes through my mind over & over...God said He wouldn't put more on us than we can bear, but this cross seems so unbearable
Nancy hope all is getting easier.......I have tried to grow these Morning Glory..but as they were looking good in the greenhouse along came a little mouse and gobbled the lot....I know they grow wild in hot countries and we have a white variety also wild....
Thank you Pea...we did indeed follow our hearts...we took daddy to another hospital for more test simply because we were seeing so many positve signs from him...but the results were not positive and there is no medical hope for my daddy...the doctor sat down and explain everything and even prayed with my sisters for my dad....two weeks is the prognosis...but God's still in the miracle business and I'm clinging to that with all my being
Thank you Joan....not getting easier....emotions running out of control...one minute calm, next sad, and even down right angry ready to knock someone's lights out and sometimes all the emotions hit all at once...this is the first grief experience in my immediate family and I'm not handling it very well...and do not ever want to face it again....so hard to accept human weakness....you long to fix it all and make all well again....but can only cling to God for spiriual strength to overcome the flesh accepting His will be done