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Photos 1791 - 1795 of 1939

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This weeks theme is very poignant to me.
& gives me my chance to tell my story.
Nearly fifty years ago, at the time of my birth myself & my mother where under the care of a consultant gynaecologist, obstetrician, I prefer butcher, who thought he new best, & didn't believe in C sections.
Despite her small stature & my obvious size he still put us through a very painful & traumatic birth.
My mother nearly bled to death & I had my right arm dislocated at the shoulder & also received severe nerve damage. The medical term for it is Erbs palsy if you're interested.
So I have spent my life with a 'disability', a word I find amusing, through his neglect.

A tragic accident, except he had also done the same to my older sister four & a half years earlier.
& as I got older & heard others stories, I realised that my family where relatively lucky compared to some he affected under his care.
If it happened now he would be struck off & not allowed to practise ever more, but at that time doctors where above the law & no recompense was possible.

My father wanted to get the gun & finish him off.
If it hadn't been for my mothers pleading he might have.
I'm glad he didn't, growing up with the stigma of a disability, or handicap as it was called then, was enough, with out having my father inside on a murder rap.

Apart from the obvious physical & social difficulties this has presented me through life, it has also left me with a mistrust of the human race as a whole, & especially those in authority, & generally regarding the latter, I've not been proven wrong.
It's probably why I submerge myself in the workings of mother nature instead of being interested in the usual stuff people fuss about. So for that I'm eternally thankful.

I'm not seeking sympathy or pity, I've had enough of them to last me many lifetimes.
More as its hands Friday I thought it time I showed my hand here on FT & told its story.
I realise there are others here with painful stories, & struggles greater than my own.
To them I say you are not alone.

So here you see my hands, & also the hand of a man from fifty years ago, who didn't care enough about the people under his care.
So Dr Inch if you're out there you owe me, & the others you affected.
An apology would suffice, a cut of your fat pension would be preferable.
I suspect you are no longer in this realm so I doubt either of those will be forthcoming, but if you have children who followed you into the medical profession I hope to hell they didn't inherit your arrogance & talent.
& if they have, I hope for their sakes they don't cross my path, or the paths of those I care about.
I may not be so forgiving second time around.

My story.

Love & peace to you all.

Following contains strong language.
Tim Yeo is a UK Conservative MP, one of the figures of authority I mistrust so much.
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Comments on this photo:

Apr 02 2010 09:53 GMT Tavascarow
All the names in the tags (apart from handsfriday) are names used to describe me throughout my life by different people.
I particularly dislike invalid, who's to say whether I'm in valid or not.
I like one armed bandit, though the first pull was rather painful, it has an air of the rogue & pirate.
Apr 02 2010 11:54 GMT RachelWoods
Brave of you to tell your story....but the people who know you, those that care and those that matter, and to the people on FT, you are just Tavascarow....despite what they did you survived, you built a life for yourself and they can't take that away.....and they will only take your spirit if you let them....
Apr 02 2010 12:51 GMT otilia
Apr 02 2010 15:05 GMT marioalbertina
Very brave Tavascarow to write your disability!
Every man has his cross to bear.
It is painful to carry when there is no guilt!
Apr 02 2010 18:15 GMT amyplim
A very beautiful picture and a moving story.
Apr 02 2010 18:19 GMT jomoud PRO
A very beautiful photo and above all a very thought provoking history.
Often society fails us or worse doesn't care what it does to some of us.
Yes it was some fifty odd years ago, but unfortunately, even today negligence like you described occurs from time to time.
It took guts to relate your history and I salute you.
People use various words to descrive what they do not understand or comprehend, it is their ignorance that comes up with hurtful misnomers.
However, for us on FT you are Tavascarow, a good friend that shares our passion for photography.
Apr 02 2010 18:30 GMT Doody PRO
I looked straight passed Tava's disability & just saw the real him - miserable old bugger - LOL
Apr 03 2010 14:40 GMT JoanaAugusto
It's really courageous of you to tell your story. Sometimes what hurts us makes us stronger. Also, beautiful picture =)
Apr 04 2010 09:34 GMT Tavascarow
Pot & kettle spring to mind Pete.
Apr 04 2010 09:40 GMT Tavascarow
I don't particularly feel it's very courageous.
The people of real courage achieve despite prejudice.
I see it more as me venting my anger. If you internalise too much & put on a brave face regardless, it can fester so needs to be released.
But yes such things do make you stronger.
Apr 04 2010 10:25 GMT Tavascarow
My spirit will always be my own my friend, though it can sometimes be a little bitter at times. I fear until such injustices can be righted in the court of law I will just have to live with it.
It always makes me angry when a nation can try criminals decades after the crime, but when an individual or group of individuals challenges the system?
Apr 04 2010 18:10 GMT sini
Good to tell your story..great hands entry!:)
Apr 04 2010 19:37 GMT rosyapple PRO
That is one powerful story Steve and I feel honouored that you have shared it here with us. I am a midwife and so can totally relate to that trauma! Whatever happened to you has not stopped you being who you are - a well balanced and talented earth pilgrim!
Apr 04 2010 21:15 GMT bennystr
Powerful story indeed Steve, well done for sharing!
Keep taking those great pics and sharing your nature with us.
Apr 06 2010 01:46 GMT shellybegood
***** Just wow.
Apr 06 2010 18:47 GMT pauli3522
wow..that is a sad story....wow...and thank you for sharing with us¡¡